Meaning Behind Words
by AtLoLevad
Summary: Elliot is shot and Oliva waits and hopes he finds the meaning behind her words. AU
1. Chapter 1

The bullet comes out of nowhere and hits him right in the chest. At first he doesn't register the pain, but then he sees the stricken look on her face and he knows. Time slows down, and his knees buckle. He falls to the ground and lands on his back. Her footsteps cause the ground to vibrate under him and he feels her hands roaming his chest for the wound. She finds it and the pressure she applies hurts. He tries to tell her so. "Liv, it hurts." But he knows nothing comes out. By the look on her face, he supposes he doesn't have much time. He tries to say her name. "Liv" But, again, he knows nothing comes out. And suddenly, the edges of his vision go dark and blurry. She must notice a change in his eyes because she says,

"El, stay with me. Please, stay with me." He wants to stay with her, he really does, but it's getting harder. The blackness is creeping in and her voice gets wavery, he doesn't know if it's because of him or her. The pain has spread, now his whole chest feels like it's on fire.

"God Dammit, Elliot. Stay with me! Where the hell is the bus?" She shouts and he is pulled back by her tone. But only for a moment. Plain floods his senses again and he blacks out.

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><p>Olivia Benson lets a little scream loose from the back of her throat when his eyes close. She keeps pushing on the bullet hole, which is still sending blood through her fingers. Again she shouts, "Where the hell is that bus?" But there is no one around to answer her. The other cops have all congregated around one of the cars. She can see several cell phones and hopes to God that one of them called 911. She can still feel his heart beating under her bloodstained fingers and the feel of it keeps her from losing her mind. She adds more pressure just as she hears the wailing of an ambulance. She brushes her eye on the shoulder of her leather jacket and is not surprised to see that there is a tiny wet spot left behind. The EMT's come running up to her and she is pushed back. She barely has time to say, "Save him, please" before Elliot is hauled into the ambulance and she is left kneeling on the sidewalk with blood on her hands.<p>

The hospital smells like antiseptic and Olivia decides she hates this smell. This exact smell, the way the waiting room in Lenox Hill Hospital smells, is her least favorite smell in the world. She's been waiting for hours, and at the same time it feels like days. Days since he got shot. Days since the ambulance took him. Days since she saw a doctor who could update her on his condition. Fin and Munch had been in to check up on her, Fin had left behind a coffee she couldn't really taste. The Captain had stopped by to get a report and had left after a few minutes. She was the only one who had remained here the whole time. She was angry that no one had bothered to stay and at the same time she knew she was being irrational. Because they all had their own case loads and didn't need to be around just waiting. The OR doors swung open and her head shot up, hoping to see the doctor that had spoken to her before. No, this doctor was a woman. Olivia looked back down at her hands and tried to rub away some of the residual blood. It wasn't coming off and Olivia gave up after a few minutes. She was going to have to find the bathroom. Olivia brushed her bangs out of her eyes and sighed. When was this doctor going to come out and tell her Elliot was alive? She couldn't take waiting anymore and stood up to pace. Several other people waiting turned to look at her, but she didn't care. All she needed was Elliot to be okay. The familiar sound of doors swinging open started Olivia and she almost cried again when the doctor coming out was Elliot's.

"Dr. Collins, is he alright? Please tell me he's alright." Olivia ran up to the man and burst out with her question. The doctor nodded and Olivia almost collapsed to the floor in relief.

"Detective Stabler is stable. He lost a lot of blood and we had to fix up several veins and arteries. An inch to the left and the bullet would've gone straight through his heart, wouldn't have had a chance. He will be staying here for a few weeks, while we make sure everything is alright." Olivia sighed.

"Thank you Doctor. Can I see him?" She looked over his shoulder and was bouncing on the balls of her feet. Olivia figured she would go and see Elliot even if the doctor said no. Dr. Collins nodded,

"You can see him, but he won't be able to talk to you. He is still under some very string anesthesia and won't be awake for several hours. His room is just down the hall." He pointed and Olivia barely waited for the words to be out of his mouth before she was running down the hallway.

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><p>Elliot Stabler was in pain. Hell, it felt like his body was being roasted over and open fire and then getting slat poured over the open burns. He couldn't open his eyes or move his arms or legs, but he was alive, or that's what he thought anyway. There was a vague beeping in the back of his mind. Elliot could hear some fuzzy noises, but he was trying to pick out a specific voice, Olivia's. He wanted to hear Olivia's voice; he needed to hear Olivia's voice. There was a bang and he found her voice.<p>

"Oh God, El. I was so worried." Her voice was closer towards the end of her sentence. He wanted to see her face, just to make sure he was alive. He wanted to talk to her, to reassure her that he was fine.

"Elliot, I am so sorry that I let you get shot. I wasn't watching. This is my entire fault. Can you ever forgive me?" She sounded like she was going to cry, and that worried Elliot. He needed to make sure she knew this wasn't her fault, to make sure she knew that it was no one's fault.

"Elliot, please just come back to me. I need you to be okay. I don't want to break in a new partner." She laughed a little bit and Elliot wished he could laugh with her. He knew she was trying to make herself feel better with her attempt at humor.

"Elliot, I have to go now. The nurses are telling me to leave. I'll be back tomorrow though. I love you." Elliot felt a slight pressure on his forehead and knew she had kissed him there.

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><p>The next morning, Olivia was at Lenox Hill the second visiting hours started. Dr. Collins met her outside Elliot's room.<p>

"Detective Benson, Detective Stabler did well overnight. The anesthesia wore off sometime in the middle of the night. He is in severe pain and has a dose of pain pills in him. He may be asleep and if he is awake, he may not be able to focus. I have to ask that you don't stay for very long. Detective Stabler needs to rest and having too much excitement will not be good." Olivia nodded and thanked the doctor. She pushed to door to Elliot's room open and found him sitting up in bed. She could see to pain in his blue eyes from the door. He smiled as she walked closer.

"El, how are you? I'm so glad you're okay." She takes a seat in the hard chair next to his bed. He nods.

"I'll be fine Liv. Are you okay?" He tries to shift closer to her, but pulls at the wound and winces. She stands up and is ready to push him back into place before she realizes that would only hurt him more.

"I'm fine, now that you're okay. I just want you to get better. I thought I lost you El. It was terrifying." She reaches over to take his hand.

"Don't worry Liv. I'm just fine. I'll be as good as new in a couple of weeks and we'll be back on the beat just like always." Elliot likes the feel of her hand wrapped around his and he squeezes her hand. She looks down at their intertwined hands and smiles.

"El, I'm glad you're okay." She looks into his blue eyes as she says it and hopes he can read the meaning behind her words.

"Me too Liv, me too." He can.

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><p>AN: Hi everybody, this is my first SVU fanfic and I'm really happy with the way it turned out. I hope everyone likes it and check out my other stories


	2. Chapter 2

Elliot Stabler was going crazy sitting in this damn hospital room. All he had to do was wait another few minutes for Olivia to get here and take him home. He was going to go nuts if she didn't get here soon. Elliot wiggled his shoulders back and forth to see if his chest hurt as much as it had the other day. Nope, only a slight twinge and it was something he could ignore. He pulled to front of his shirt forward to look at the wound. It was still red, the edges slightly puckered and there were faint black and blue marks around the perimeter. All in all, the worst injury he had ever gotten. Twenty minutes later, just as he thought he would go insane, Olivia came running in.

"I'm so sorry. The traffic was ridiculous and I couldn't find a parking spot close enough to the building. How are you?" She helped Elliot sit up and get out of the bed. He laughed at her panicked expression.

"I'm better, now that you're here." He missed the brief smile on her face as he continued, "I would've gone crazy sitting here for another minute." Olivia helped him into his jacket and frowned as he winced when she accidently brushed the bullet wound.

"I'm sorry. I could've always sent Fin and Munch. They were much closer to you anyway. They're working a rape case." Now she laughed out loud at his expression.

"Sitting in a car with Munch for long periods of time? No thank you. I'd take Bad Ass Benson any day." He nonchalantly took her hand in his and led her down to the nurses' station. Olivia smiled slightly at the determined way Elliot was trying to leave the hospital and the feel of his large hand warming her small one.

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><p>On the way back to Elliot's apartment, Olivia was debating with herself to bring up their relationship. She was terrified he was going to say something along the lines of "Liv you're my best friend and I'm so glad I can count on you." Nothing in there about loving her the way she wanted to be loved. Olivia sighed; she needed to stop thinking about it.<p>

"Liv, you in there? I've been calling your name for five minutes." Elliot laughed when she jumped.

"I'm sorry, I guess I was zoning out for a second. How're you feeling? No pain? Do you need any Advil? I can stop at CVS before we go to your apartment." Olivia rambled, simultaneously loving and hating the way her heart sped up at a look form his blue eyes.

Elliot shook his head, "Nah, I'm okay. I've got a stockpile of meds at home. This policing really takes it out of me, especially when you have to tackle the running perps." He unbuckled the seatbelt as Olivia pulled into a spot in front of his apartment. She made no move to unbuckle or turn off her car.

"Hey, you coming up? It's lonely up there, especially when the face you've seen for the past week decides she's not going to stay with you. Please?" He shot her a grin that melted her heart. Olivia grinned back and turned off her car.

"I guess I'll keep you company, but only because you were shot." She fell into step with him and they made their way up to the apartment.

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><p>On the way up to the apartment, both detectives were quiet, each lost in their own thoughts. Elliot kept sneaking peeks at Olivia from the corner of his eye. She looked upset and he wondered why. Elliot smiled at her when she looked his way and couldn't help the way his heart beat when she gave a half-smile back. Maybe, just maybe, it was time to tell her. He had done a lot of thinking while he was in the hospital and he had figured out something. He was…<p>

"El, you want me to grab your bag? I don't know if carrying that thing is good for your stitches." Olivia manhandled the bag away from him. Yeah, he so was.

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><p>AN: sorry for the shorter chapter, but I wanted a few more reviews before I kept going. I'm not sure if they're totally in character yet and I would like some feedback. Review. =)


	3. Chapter 3

Elliot woke up sometime after six the next morning. He squinted against the light coming from his living room. 'Had he left that light on?' He couldn't really remember. To tell the truth, he couldn't really remember much from last night at all. Why was that? He was pretty sure he wasn't drunk. Elliot stood up and stretched; only to fall back on his bed in pain when the still healing wound stretched painfully. There was the reason for not remembering. He must have been doped up from his pain meds. He stood up again and pulled an NYPD zip-up sweatshirt gently on. He went into the living room only to find Olivia curled up on the couch. Elliot grinned at the sight of her. Her brown hair was mussed and she held to blanket in a tight fist. He padded as quietly as he could into the kitchen to get a glass of water. As he was leaning against the counter, Olivia woke up. Elliot laughed, not unkindly, at her dazed expression.

"Good Morning, sleep well?" He went and sat on the chair next to the couch.

Olivia smiled; she really liked waking up to see Elliot. "I did, I'm sorry for hijacking your clothes. Sleeping in my jeans and sweater was a little uncomfortable." Olivia pushed back the blanket to show Elliot his NYPD training shirt and a pain of basketball shorts. His heart sped up at the sight of her in his too big clothes. He could get used to that.

"No it's fine Liv. You really didn't have to spend the night." Even though he'd wanted her to spend the night for years, preferably in his bed.

"You were in some pretty bad pain last night and I didn't want to leave you." Olivia twisted her hands together as she remembered the way he thrashed all over the bed, finally getting so hot and uncomfortable he'd taken off his shirt. She felt flustered at the thought of it, even though she could never act on those feelings.

Elliot waved his hand in front of her face. "Liv, you in there?"

She smiled and nodded, "Yeah, I'm here. What's up?" She went into the kitchen because Elliot had a weird look on his face and she hoped he wasn't going to say something she couldn't handle at the moment.

"I wanted to thank you Liv. You've been such a great friend. You want to stay for a while?" He hoped she would say yes.

Olivia smiled at his offer. She would love to stay with him, but she knew they wanted different things. She didn't' think it would be okay to stay right now.

"El, I…I have to go check in. I haven't checked with Cap for a while. If you need anything just call, but I should get going." She hurried into the bathroom and changed back into her clothes from yesterday. As she ran out of the apartment she called back,

"I'll wash these and bring them back either later or tomorrow." She ran out of the apartment like it was on fire. Elliot groaned, he hadn't meant for her to run away like a scared animal. All he had wanted was for her to stay a while longer.

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><p>"Damnit! Damnit all!" Olivia screamed as she pulled away from the curb in her car. She ran, she ran like a scared little girl. Just the thought of Elliot made her heart pound and she loved it. Her thoughts returned to the night before.<p>

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><p><em>The partners had been watching some movie, neither one really paying attention, when Elliot had begun yawning loud enough that Olivia could hear his jaw crack. She had stood up,<em>

_ "Alright, you need your rest. Take a pain pill and head to bed. I'll see you in morning." She had ushered him into the kitchen to take a pill and then into his bedroom to sleep. The whole way he had protested like a little boy._

_ "Aw, Liv don't make me go to bed. I'm not that tired really, I promise. Besides, the movie was just getting to the good part." He had pouted in her direction and she had laughed._

_ "El, you don't even know what was playing. Now go to bed. It's been a long day and I'm tired too." She hadn't expected what he would say next._

_ "So stay. Borrow some of my clothes and take my bed." At her look, he amended. "I'll take the couch and you take my bed." He winced as a twinge of pain shot through his chest, but hid it so Olivia wouldn't worry._

_ "El, I can't stay. You need to sleep in your bed and I have to go home. I promise I'll stop by to see you before I head into work tomorrow morning. Now get to bed." She reached up to kiss his cheek and gathered her things. She was at the door when he said her name._

_ "Liv." It was his tone that made her turn around. When she did, his face was chalk white and he was holding onto his chest. She dropped her things and ran to him._

_ "El, what's wrong? El, talk to me." She felt his face and he shook his head._

_ "My chest hurts like hell Liv. Ahhh this really hurts." He winced as she unzipped the sweatshirt he was wearing and looked at the wound. It was red and looked painful, but she wasn't a doctor and couldn't understand when was wrong. Olivia led him to his bed and sat him down._

_ "El, I have to take you back to the doctor. I don't know what's wrong with this. I don't want it to get infected." She was worried._

_ "No, I'm okay. It's not as bad anymore. I'll be okay. Just give me a pill and I'll be fine." He tried to smile, but it looked more like a grimace. Elliot leaned back against the headboard. Olivia went and got him a second pill and a glass of water, the worried frown never leaving her face. Elliot took the pill and within five minutes he was asleep. Olivia was torn, she needed to go home, because this was not an ideal situation, but she needed to stay and make sure Elliot was okay. She decided to grab a shirt and pair of shorts from his drawers and changed in the bathroom. She sat on the couch and flipped through channels for a while until a noise from Elliot's room caused her to investigate. He was still asleep, but thrashing in his bed so violently, Olivia was afraid he'd fall off. She hurried over and tried to grab his hand. She ended up sitting on the bed next to him and rubbing his arm._

_ "Elliot, please, wake up. You need help. Oh god El." She felt his forehead and was relieved to find that it was cool. That was good, it meant his wound wasn't infected, she hoped. Olivia found her eyes closing and willed herself to stay awake. The last thing she needed was Elliot to wake up with her arms wrapped around him. She looked at him, and saw that he was asleep. She snuck out of bed and went to lay on the couch._

_ Olivia woke to the sound of Elliot's voice. She looked at her watch, 3 am. _

_ "Liv, Live where are you? No stop, don't take her. NO, I need her. I…" Elliot was moaning in his sleep and Olivia stood in the doorway for a moment, shocked that he had been dreaming of her. When he started to toss and turn again, she took he spot on the bed next to him._

_ "El, come on. Do you need anything?" She asked him as she felt his forehead again._

_Elliot mumbled, "You," and rolled over. Olivia's eyes widened and she sat on the bed just staring at his back for a minute. The she noticed how damp his sweatshirt was. She felt his neck and arms and found that he was covered in sweat. She helped him sit up._

_ "Elliot, come on, you need to change into a t-shirt. You're sweating." She propped him up as Elliot unzipped his sweatshirt._

_ "Thanks Liv, I'm glad you stayed." He mumbled, his eyes shut, as he fell back against the pillows. Olivia waited for another minute to make sure he was still asleep, before she went back into the living room. As she sat on the couch, Olivia thought about running. She needed to get out of the apartment, before she thought about what Elliot had said. She couldn't leave him though, he would be confused when he woke up and possibly in pain, she couldn't do that to her partner, her best friend. _

_ Olivia sat up thinking about his words and convinced herself he was delirious from pain and his medicines. Sometime after these last thought, Olivia fell asleep and was only woken the next morning, by the feeling of Elliot's eyes on her._

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><p>Now in the light of day, she wasn't so sure he was talking because of his pain. Elliot knew he wasn't talking out of pain when he remembered what he had said to Olivia the night before. And now he knew for certain.<p>

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><p>AN: and here's cahpter 3. I hope everyone is still reading and enjoying. I know I'm loving writing this story. Please review. I'd love all of your comments =)


	4. Chapter 4

Elliot stood outside of Olivia's apartment. He had been standing here for five minutes now and he wasn't sure what he was waiting for. No, he knew what he was waiting for. He was waiting for her to come out and run into his arms. But that wasn't going to happen unless she knew how he felt. He needed to make sure she wouldn't run again. He sunk to sit on the steps outside her building. He had been sitting there for a few minutes when Olivia came running down the steps. Elliot jumped up and grabbed her arm. She screamed.

"Jesus Christ Elliot! Don't do that to me!" She scowled and smacked his shoulder. Elliot grinned sheepishly.

"Sorry Liv, I needed to talk to you. Why didn't you come over this morning?" He had missed her. Even though she had run out on him yesterday morning, he had really thought she would be back.

Olivia looked at the ground. "I just got back in. Fin and Munch picked up a rape/assault last night and I was helping out. I only came home to change and shower. I'm heading back now. I was going to call." She forced a smile and asked him how he was feeling.

"I'm fine Liv. I want to know why you left yesterday. Liv, I know what I said that night and I don't know if what I said scared you or what, but you have to know that I mean it. Every single word. Liv this is not easy for me to say." Elliot was cut off when Olivia held up her hand to silence him. Elliot could practically see her walls being built up.

"Elliot, I have to go to work. You didn't say anything the other night and I left yesterday because I had to get to work, which is where I need to be now. I'll talk to you later, okay?" She looked into his eyes and Elliot knew he was going to have to break down her walls.

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><p>Olivia hurried into the station and practically threw her things on her desk. Fin looked over at her,<p>

"Lover's quarrel? Stabler hasn't stopped calling all morning." He adopted a tone he thought sounded like Elliot Stabler. "'Is Liv in yet? Call me when she gets there. Are you sure she's not there? I need to talk to her. Fin, goddamn it just tell me if she's there.'" He and Munch shared a laugh, but Olivia wasn't laughing.

"I don't know what you're talking about and don't you have a case you should be investigating? There are more important things to be thinking about than Stabler." Olivia violently flipped open a case file and didn't say another word. Fin and Munch shared a look and buried their noses in case files.

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><p>Six hours later Olivia stumbled into her apartment with a sense of satisfaction. The three detectives had collared the perp with a full confession. It was an airtight case. On the flip side Olivia felt guilty that she had screened every single one of Elliot's calls. She unlocked her front door and almost screamed when she saw Elliot sitting on her couch.<p>

"ELLIOT STABLER! This is the second time you've scared me out of my mind today! Do you plan on making this a habit?" She sunk to the arm chair next to the couch.

Elliot knew it was wrong to sit in her apartment waiting for her, but there was no other way she was going to talk to him otherwise. Eventually he was going to be back at work and what was she going to do then, request a new partner? Not if he could help it. He leaned toward her, trying to be careful of his healing wound.

"Liv, you have to talk to me. I need to know why you're so afraid. I want to help you. I'm coming back to work soon; we're going to have to work together again. Our 97 % closure rate might be in jeopardy." He smiled at her, hoping to get her smiling back. It worked, sort of. She cracked a half smile.

"El, I'm sorry I yelled at you. I just wasn't expecting you to be sitting in my living room when I got home." She kicked off her boots and tucked her feet under her. She and Elliot looked at each other for a minute before she spoke.

"I'm scared." She whispered. "I'm terrified that I'm going to get in too deep and you're going to leave or I'm going to mess it up." She bit her thumbnail and wouldn't meet Elliot's eyes. He reached over to take her hand, but she pulled back.

"El, I want to let you in. Being your partner over the years has been the best experience of my life and I…I don't want you to leave it, but I also know that I really need you in my life." Olivia sighed and waited for Elliot to leave. When he didn't, Olivia looked up into his face and saw his eyes.

God, his eyes really did it for her. She saw the emotion in them and almost cried. It took so much to expose herself like this and she hated the thought of being rejected. She was almost certain Elliot would let her down gently, or would he?

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><p>AN: Wow! two chapters in one day. I'm really impressed with myself. jkjk All of your reviews make me want to write more and when I get a new review I'm so excited. So please keep reviewing if you want more chapters =)


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: I just wanted to address something to a reviewer who didn't put a username: This story is AU. That means Elliot was never married to Kathy. I know he would never leave her in the show, but this isn't following canon. I just wanted to make that clear. Enjoy!

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><p>Elliot smiled at Olivia and reached over to take her hand. This time she let him. He gently pulled her up and over so she was sitting next to him on the couch.<p>

"Liv, you don't know how long I've waited for you to say those words. I would never leave you and I'm going to try my damned hardest to never hurt you. You need to let me in. I know it's going to be hard, but we know each other better than we know ourselves. We can make this work Liv." Elliot hoped Olivia wouldn't run again. She didn't.

"El, I…I want to let you in, but this is hard. I've never been in a relationship with someone that I've really cared so much about. I don't want to screw it up." She leaned against his shoulder, not caring that it would make it harder to resist him. Elliot pulled her closer and stroked back her hair.

"We can take it slow Liv. I'm not doing anything unless you want me to. I promise we can go as slow as you want. Okay?" He tilted her face up to his and she nodded.

"Okay, we'll give this," She gestured between them, "a try." Elliot's grin made Olivia grin in turn.

They sat in comfortable silence for a while, Olivia tucked under Elliot's arm and Elliot's feet resting on the coffee table, when Olivia broke the silence.

"El?" She whispered.

"Yeah?" He whispered back.

"Kiss me." Olivia whispered and Elliot leaned down, stopping centimeters before her lips.

"You sure?" Olivia could feel his breath on her face and nodded. Elliot leaned down and kissed her.

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><p>It was like something snapped inside Olivia. The second Elliot's lips touched hers she knew she needed him and she knew she loved him. When Elliot pulled away, they were both left breathless. Elliot looked a bit dazed as he grinned and said, "Wow! We should've done that a long time ago." Olivia giggled. Elliot looked shocked.<p>

"Olivia Benson, giggling? You don't giggle." He kissed the top of her head.

"Never had a reason to before. I have one now." She smiled and reached her heads up to kiss him again. Olivia pulled back and smiled.

"Now it's late. I have to get up early tomorrow to discuss things for the trial with Alex. Go home." She said with a smile. Elliot nodded and stood up.

"Alright, I'll see you tomorrow then? How about I come and get you for lunch? I'm still out for another week." Elliot shrugged his jacket on as Olivia nodded.

"That sounds good. I'll see you tomorrow then?" Elliot agreed to meet her at the station at 12 and left.

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><p>As he was driving home, Elliot couldn't believe the complete 180 his life had taken over the past few days. Getting shot might have been the best thing to ever happen to him, not that he wanted it to happen again. He kept replaying the kiss he and Olivia had just shared. That had been something he had wanted for years now. Elliot worried that Olivia was going to change her mind by tomorrow, though. She had seemed happy enough tonight, but after she'd had time to think about things, would she still want to be with him in the morning? Elliot hoped so.<p>

By the time he got home, it was 11:30 and he was exhausted. He wanted to make sure he'd be awake when he met Liv for lunch. Depending on how the meeting with Alex went, she could either be in a great mood or in one of those moods where she wanted to punch someone in the head. He hoped she would be in a good mood tomorrow.

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><p>As Olivia got ready for bed, she couldn't help think about how great it had been sitting tucked up close to Elliot and getting to kiss him without worrying about getting too close. She worried though. She worried that she would get too close and he would leave or she would mess it up and then she would be a wreck. The magnitude of her feelings for Elliot scared her. She had never loved any of her previous boyfriends the way she loved Elliot. She wondered if she would be able to let Elliot in completely on an everyday basis.<p>

Olivia knew she was a complicated person and probably very difficult to get along with. She knew that Elliot had put up with a lot over the years they had been partners and she wondered if he would want to put up with her 24 hours a day. Sometimes she doesn't want to put up with herself 24 hours a day. She needs time to think and to evaluate what's best for everyone. She already knows what she wants.

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><p>AN: So there's chapter 5. I hopr everyone is still reading and enjoying. I'm not sure how much longer this is going to be, but if anyone has any ideas for what they want to see, I'd be happy to hear them =) Enjoy!


	6. Chapter 6

The next morning Olivia found herself in the station far too early for her liking. Alex was already there and waiting. By the look on Alex's face, Olivia knew it wasn't going to be an east morning. She poured herself a mug of decent coffee and settled in.

It was almost lunch time when Alex finally let Olivia come up for air. She needed to stretch her legs, so she wandered outside to take a walk. She wondered if she should call Elliot. She hadn't had a chance to talk to him since last night and Olivia was thinking about cancelling their lunch date. She wanted to go out, but she wasn't sure if she wanted to tell everyone yet and if Elliot came to get her, their cover would be blown. Olivia had made up her mind by the time she got back into the station.

She stepped into the bathroom to make her call. He answered after 3 rings.

"Stabler." Olivia sighed as he answered. What was she doing? Ruining a good thing, she answered her own question.

"Hello?" His voice sounded in her ear and she was startled.

"Sorry, hi El. How're you feeling? Better?"

"Yeah, I'm fine Liv. I was just going to head out to come get you." She could hear the smile in his voice. She hated what she was going to do.

"El, don't come pick me up. I don't want to go to lunch. It's better this way." And without waiting for his response, she hung up, tears making their way to her eyes.

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><p>Elliot stared at his phone in shock. Had she really just hung up on him? This is exactly what he was afraid of. She stopped and thought about what she was doing instead of just doing it. He needed her to stop thinking and just be with him. He knew he had told her he would take it slow, but now he wasn't playing. If he wanted her, he'd have to make her let him in. He looked around his apartment, thinking about what he could do. He caught sight of his red blanket and knew exactly what he should do. He changed into a nicer pair of jeans and a short sleeve button down before grabbing his car keys and running out of the apartment.<p>

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><p>Olivia sunk down in her desk chair and tried not to think about what she had just done. She held her phone and fingered the buttons, fighting herself not to call him back. She knew she shouldn't have done it, but somewhere in the back of her mind it was the right thing to do. She sent off a quick email to Alex and picked up her jacket and bag.<p>

"Cap, I'm going out to lunch." She called to Cragen and once she received the 'go ahead' she walked over to the elevator. She leaned against the wall of the elevator and once the doors closed she allowed a tear to fall.

Maybe she'd hurry over to Elliot's and apologize for being so messed up. She'd wandered over to her car without really seeing where she was going.

"Hi Liv." His voice startled her and she almost dropped her bag. He looked apologetic when he saw that he had scared her.

"El, I have to say, your skills are unparalleled. It usually takes a lot more to scare me." She managed a smile that she knew looked forced. Of course Elliot would show up just as she was feeling guilty over cancelling on him.

"You looked pretty distracted so it wasn't hard. Anyway, come with me." He took her hand and against her better judgment, Olivia allowed him to lead her.

* * *

><p>Elliot was shocked when she didn't pull away or make some dumb excuse. She was quiet as they walked to his car and he expected nothing less. She must have been processing everything that was happening. She finally spoke up when they reached his car.<p>

"Elliot where are we going?" She paused before getting into the car and frowned when his answer was vague.

"You'll just have to trust me, now won't you?" He laughed, hoping she like his surprise.

They drove for a minute or two before hitting a stand still. Elliot groaned. Olivia smiled and nudged his hand with hers.

"What am I? A horrible bore that you can't be stuck in the car with for more than a minute." Her laughing smile made Elliot smile back at her.

"Liv, why'd you cancel on me this morning?" Elliot asked the air in front of him, hating to take this smile off her face. Olivia looked out the window, not sure why she had cancelled on him. It had seemed like a good idea at the time.

"I guess I was scared." She settled on. "I didn't want to ruin things between us. I like you too much."

Elliot groaned and Olivia frowned. "What? Is that a bad reason or something? Do you want me to give you a different excuse? Maybe I don't like your eye color." She was getting angrier and Elliot could only laugh.

"It's not your excuse. It's just…we've been partners for seven years now Liv. Nothing's going to change between us. The only thing that's going to change is that we won't have to go home alone. Come on Liv, open up to me." He turned his head to look at her fully. Olivia looked vaguely shell-shocked and Elliot had to prompt her with her name once or twice before she answered.

* * *

><p>Olivia took her time to answer, even though she knew it would make Elliot nervous.<p>

"How do you know that? El, what if we end up hating each other because we see each other so much? What if we can't work together anymore?"

Elliot countered with, "What if we work so well together our closure rates go up? What if we decide we like being around each other so much we retire and move to a farm? Olivia, no one knows what could happen, we just have to try. Christ Liv, there's only so much I can take." Elliot's face was turning red and he was getting irritated. Olivia got worried, could his blood pressure be good for his recovery? She could hear the passion in his voice, but wondered where the farm idea came from.

"El…" Olivia was cut off by the ringing of her cell phone. "Sorry" she mumbled before answering. Five minutes later she got off the phone and Elliot had figured out that she needed to get back to the station. Olivia apologized profusely and Elliot took the next turn.

"Aw, El I really wanted to know what the surprise was. I'm so sorry I got called back."

Elliot waved off her apology. "It's not a big deal Liv. I was just going to take you to Central Park and discuss everything we just talked about anyway. I'll see you later than?" He questioned as she climbed out of the car in front of the station.

"Yeah I guess. El, I'm sorry." She really was.

And he knew it.

* * *

><p>AN: I am so sorry for the obscenely long wait on this chapter. I've had it written, but I never got a chance to type it until now. I'm going to try and get teh next chapter typed soon. Enjoy and please review =)


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